It's been too long since I've been surprised. Where did delightful serendipities go? Where did magic go?
Everything's predictable now. I get it. I get who I am and what's going to happen while I'm gone. I get that I'm letting myself fall in love, fucking it up on purpose, struggling to make things right. I get the purposeful awkwardness to avoid intimacy, I get the shyness posing as cuteness, I get the listening to albums on repeat while I fantasize about being with you.
I'm so tired of the rut.
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